By Doug De Graffenried

I have never successfully answered the “why” question. There are times in a relationship when one will ask the other one, “Why did you hang the picture in that particular place?” “Why did you eat the last of the Blue Bell ice cream?” “Why did you mow the lawn as you did?” I think I have failed in answering those questions. It is because the answer to the question moved behind the realm of action into the realm of motivation. How many of us have the emotional intelligence to authentically answer a motivational question? Why did you blow up at the nice person in the restaurant, when they didn’t melt the cheese on your cheeseburger?

I had an unanswerable “why” question this weekend. The dogs escaped the yard. When our dogs get out of the yard, they jet. Rolo is part Beagle and the sniffer in him takes over and he has to run each scent in the neighborhood. I know that if anything happens to Rolo, I will be in the eternal doghouse. He got out by opening a gate. No kidding, one of the dogs opened a gate. I don’t know how, and they are not confessing.

Why were the dogs in that part of the yard? That part of the yard is gated off on four sides, because my greenhouse is in that part of the yard. I was working in the greenhouse and the dogs were with me. I don’t know what motivated the dogs to be with me. I can’t explain canine motivation. I took a break and went inside; the dogs decided to execute an escape plan. The dogs did return, exhausted. I was released from the doghouse. However, the why questions continued. I know I am frustrating because I have never answered a why question, well.

The same in my professional life. Yes, I am called to this ministry. Yes, I read and study scripture daily. Yes, I talk to God several times a day. Even in ministry, I’m not good with the “why” question. “Why did this happen to me?” “Why am I sick?” “Why is my life falling apart?” I have been doing the preacher thing for forty-eight years. Here is how I now answer the “why” question. The answer to the “why” question is the purview of management, I’m only in customer service.

That is not where the conversation stops, although I have never been able to answer “why” question, I do have some insights about the better question; “how.” How do I move forward given my life circumstances How do I trust in Jesus in the middle of this storm? How do I put one foot in front of the other so I can take the next step? The question for all of us is….

How?